Thursday, October 7, 2010
Birthdays have been bittersweet for me ever since my mid-20s. On the one hand, nothing massages your ego more than a bunch of friends and family getting together to celebrate your existence! On the other hand, it is a reminder that transitioning (including hormone treatment and SRS) is more successful the younger it is started. So as my 20s slipped into my 30s and then my 40s, I could almost physically feel my masculine physical traits digging in and making it that much harder to convincingly be female whenever I finally got up the gumption to do it. To be honest, right now I'm just tired. Tired of wishing that more if not all human societal groups would just drop all their divisiveness and claims of primacy, and realize that with all our differences, we are all still human and should be equally welcomed and loved. The cynic in me says that history shows that is just not the stronger instinct in human nature. I'm tired of fighting it.