|pic from flickr user Teresia|
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
Ahh. I'm back for a day or two. That is, I'm free to be my femme self. Various family visits, kids moving back in temporarily, and other miscellaneous bits of pieces of life have been conspiring to prevent my just being me. But it is spring break, so both kids are out of town for the day, and my wife, who says the right things about my dressing in front of her, but visibly stiffens a bit and behaves a bit weirdly when I do so, is also out of town today for work. So, here I am. What am I wearing? Well, to be honest, just jeans and a sweatshirt. But, and here's the thing, I'm comfortably happy walking around barefoot, not having to worry that someone will drop by and I'll have to scramble to find socks to cover my pink toenails, or duck into the bathroom and pull of my bra. Now, there's no question I'll get more prettily dressed up a little later (some cute recent purchases I haven't had a chance to really try out), but for now, I'm content just freely being me.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
But, it turns out that of all things, a traffic jam in the pickles, olives, salad dressings aisle ended up giving me a big smile that will probably carry me through the day. I am not officially public as a transwoman yet, so I was just out in a fleece jacket, T-shirt, jeans, and running shoes, my hair in its normal braid down the back. No makeup, no attempts to add a few hints of femininity.
As I politely waited with my shopping basket for several indecisive ladies to decide which way to move in order to clear space for me to pass, I heard one old lady tell another (less observant or less mobile) lady, "we need to move to let her pass," giving me a smile. Yay! Maybe once I do go public I won't stand out as much as I fear I will. Who knows? Now, it is quite possible her eyesight was failing her, but even so, I don't consider my general blurry shape to be very feminine at all. I certainly have to hips, and even in a tight T-shirt I only barely have boobs, which this time were mostly covered by a shapeless oversized unisex fleece jacket anyway. In other words, in a situation where I had no reason whatsoever to be recognized as a "her", I was.
I know, hardly worth blogging about, but hey, I take my itty bitty victories seriously, wherever and whenever I can get them.